After Susan Lulu’s first four catastrophic experiences, she had to learn. It would be impossible for any father to take a defiant and willfully ignorant child to a dangerous place. So she wised up, allowing me to retell some of the delightful adventures I had with my first husband Bish when we lived in Naples on the Gulf for five years. Each of these encounters is true, except the frog across the face incident actually happened while we were careening around a dangerous corner at a major intersection in downtown Naples. The frog splatted directly across Bish’s face. It was huge, and obscured one of his eyes. He said he thought it was the hand of Satan. I crawled around on the floor of the Landcruiser I was laughing so hard.